Schulzy wrote: ↑Wed Nov 09, 2022 12:26 pm
Do you ever stop to consider your life and the choices you've made, wondering where you would be or what you might be doing if you had chosen differently? Doing that today.....
Absolutely! I'm 43, married, with 3 stepkids and a bio daughter, and I've thought many times about the butterfly effect going all the way back to about 4th grade that got me to where I am. 4th grade is when this kid named Josh moved to town, and happened to move into my best friend's neighborhood. Thanks to being neighbors, they became friends, which of course meant we all did - lots of playing baseball / football, trading baseball cards, bike rides around town, maybe some Nintendo now and then - early 90s stuff. When the aforementioned best friend had to move away, Josh and I became quick besties. All through Junior High and High School, we were pretty much inseparable. Until right before senior year, when he, too, had to move away. By now it was '97, the internet was in its early stages, so we at least got to keep in touch through email and whatnot. All he really wanted to do was move back after that year, but his parents roped him into at least trying one year of community college down there. Well, in that year, he made some friends with his Pizza Hut coworkers, one of whom introduced him to some new music, which will be relevant in a few more sentences. He moved back to Minnesota the following year, and since I had flunked out of my first year of college, we decided to just get an apartment together and be roomies, and get boring factory jobs while we figured out what our next steps in life would be.
Now, while I'd been in college that year, I discovered this bomb-ass music store that bought and sold used CDs. Picked up so much good music through that place - and while we were there one day, Josh suggested I buy this CD called "My Own Prison," by a new band called Creed. Well, I did, and hot damn, did I fall in love. They quickly became my (our) favorite band, and I followed them through their entire rise and fall. Josh tragically passed away in a car accident later that year, and while I legitimately loved the music, holding onto it was also a great way to hold onto his memory.
I moved to this small town in Iowa after that, to live with my Grandma for a bit and try out a community college down here. And during these years, I watched as Creed disintegrated (literally before my eyes - I was front row at The Concert That Shall Not Be Mentioned in Chicago). And since I was such a huge fan of the guys, I pledged my allegiance to Tremonti and Co., and followed their journey to what would become Alter Bridge. And during those early ODR days, they had a contest on their website - join the email list, and get entered into a drawing for an autographed PRS Tremonti SE guitar! Well, lo and behold, little ol' me won that contest!
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Pictured: Me and my crazy hair showing off my prize possession with the band!
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Now, throughout the entirety of my life, I'd had this little dream of being a musician. It always felt like just that, a dream, something unattainable, because I had no formal music training of any kind (beyond elementary school music class) and I had no idea how I'd ever learn how to play music, or find a band to sing with since I live in this small town in BFE, Iowa. So, over the next couple of years, I took this shiny new toy and, even though it was signed by the band, I couldn't help but tinker around with it and try to learn a few songs by tab. I didn't really learn songs, per se, mostly just little riffs and a chord or two, just enough to dip my toe in the water. That is, until I overheard a couple of friends at my workplace talking about getting together to start up a band. Now, I didn't have any illusions of being good enough to be in a band, so I asked about just coming over to hang out and be part of the entourage. They said sure, and when I mentioned that I had a guitar (I don't remember if I mentioned how much skill I didn't have), they said to bring it on over!
So I did. And by the end of the day on October 1, 2006, I was officially the guitarist in a shitty garage rock band called Wikked! (Fun fact: you can hear one of our songs on the TABN Community Album.) As I said, I didn't know how to play anything - but as it turns out, neither did anyone else. We basically invented our own music from the ground up. And in doing so, we cultivated this friendship, not only amongst ourselves but with our various families, friends, anyone we could suck into the vortex of what I would dub our "Wikked Familia." And thanks to learning more about Tremonti and his strange alternate tunings, I discovered that Open D5 tuning (DADDAD) was AMAZING for just taking one finger, either barred or on one string, and running it up and down the fretboard to create chords - and when I played with various settings on my amp, I managed to fart out a whole bunch of songs. I've always had a pretty good knack for rhythm, timing, and structure, that side of music theory, so becoming a solid rhythm guitarist came pretty naturally.
We cranked out so many songs that we ended up dropping our first album within a year or so. And we couldn't just keep this magic to ourselves, so we started putting on shows. As I mentioned, we live in this small town in the midwest, so finding venues for original rock music wasn't always easy. And so, we did what any reasonable shitty garage rock band would do -- reserve the bandshell at our local city park, and put on our own shows for the aforementioned Wikked Familia, as well as everyone else in town as, apparently, the sound traveled halfway across town from what I hear.
Well, a few blocks away lived this woman. She was married, with 3 kids, but it wasn't a very happy marriage. A controlling, narcissistic husband kept her mostly cooped up in the house - but when she heard this loud rock music playing outside, she had to investigate. She later found out that the lead singer was someone she had been friends with in her high school years, so when we did another show a few months later, she gathered up her kids and brought them to check it out. She talked to him afterwards, and while we were all wandering about, he introduced me to her as well. I thought she was gorgeous, but of course, as is my luck, she was married with kids. We ended up befriending on Facebook, and being casual acquaintances, but I didn't think anything more would come of it.
With her marriage being on the rocks, it eventually gave way. He moved out and left, and she had this newfound freedom to make friends and have a life again. In our casual acquaintance, we had discovered that we had a lot in common - a love for biking, yoga, coffee, similar music taste, and so on. So we decided to get together for coffee one afternoon, and it went well. We didn't have particular intentions on anything beyond friendship, but sometimes things happen. The Wikked thing had fallen apart a couple years prior, but since I'd learned a few more cowboy chords, I was now off doing my solo acoustic vanity project called Moonrise Blue. And since I happened to have a show coming up a week later, I invited her to come along with me (it was at a coffee joint in Rochester, MN, about an hour away). She managed to talk the ex into actually watching the kids for a few hours, and she came along to be my honorary roadie / videographer. I think it was pretty clear that some feels were starting to happen, and her watching me attempt to be cool, I believe, pushed her over the edge. A couple weeks later we shared our first kiss, and the rest was history.
Our seven year kissaversary just so happens to be about a week ago, and today I sit here, happily married with those 3 kids and a 5 year old bio daughter who's growing to love singing. It's funny how times can change, rearrange, and it all comes full circle, as they say.